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Episode 103: Easy Parenting Mindset

In this episode, I want to talk about why parenting is often not that easy. This is probably a different way to think for most people. And yet, whatever your experience of parenting is, it can get better.

In this episode, you will learn:

  1.  Why parenting is often not that easy
  2.  How to make parenting much easier


  1. The Only 2 Reasons a Teenager Rebels
  2. Why Having a Best Friend is a Bad Idea!
  3. Free Mini Writing Course



The Danger and Goodness of the Internet for Your Children

Well, what do you think?  Is Rosemond overstating it?

“To me letting a child use the Internet unsupervised is akin to letting a child walk thru the red light district in Amsterdam without a guardian,” explained Rosemond.  “It’s a very, very dangerous thing.” -John Rosemond http://www.live5news.com/story/14685559/parenting-expert-talks-about-facebook

Well yes, it is dangerous.  There are lurking charlatans and obsessive addictions just waiting to happen.  And yet, a wealth of knowledge is also at our fingertips.  We can connect with old friends…or wind up rekindling an old romance into a destructive affair.  We can save money or lose a fortune.

In my years of pastoral counseling, I have seen it all (I really think so…from the psychotic to the sublime); consistently, there are people who have not found the simple fact that if you make no provision for the “flesh.”  They don’t know the power of avoiding a situation…the power of admitting you are not strong enough to resist.  For example, I’m not strong enough to resist chips in the home.  Yes, we have them, but Jody does not keep a constant supply on hand.  If they were here all the time, I’d eat them all the time.  Sorry, it’s just a fact (you know…the salt, the crunch, the dipping!!!).

Well, join the reality of the dangers of the internet.  The fact is that you just need to stay away from the stuff that isn’t good for you.  Get over the silliness of thinking you should be stronger.  You are not.

Now, doesn’t that turn out to be twice as true for the kids?  Yes, they need discernment and wisdom, but that will grow over time.  Our simple solution was to trust the least-tempted-by-the-internet soul in our home; Jody!  In researching it though, we concluded that an internet filter was the way to go.  We decided on SafeEyes and have found nothing but good things (speed is unaffected and the customer support has been exceptional).  Frankly, I don’t care which you use…but I do say, “Use something.”  Basically, with 5 men in the household, our answer became easy.  Jody is the only one who knows the “password.”  Yes, if I get a site blocked that I need, then I ask her to log me in to use it.  What an easy way for me to show some humility (and honesty) about the dangers.  What an easy way for me to not have to think about looking at something tantalizing.  Life is too short and the consequences are too lasting.

If you have gotten into trouble or need help, please check out my friend Jonathan Daugherty’s website @ www.bebroken.com

In the meantime, don’t run; use the internet for good.  Redeem it, but respect it.



Fred Lybrand

Get Safe Eyes Parental Control Software – One price for three computers!

Are You Trying to Trick Your Kids into Learning and Obeying? (Video)

I’m not sure if it is shear desperation or that we just didn’t quite come up in a home that showed us how—
But, the truth is that we often try to use ‘tactics’ instead of PRINCIPLES in leading our children to
as wise future.  Might as well call it what it is— we are trying to trick them in to doing the right thing!

Are You Trying to Trick Your Kids into Learning and Obeying?

If you think this is helpful, there are two things I’d request:
1.  Share your thoughts here for all of us to consider.
2.  Pass this along
I’m cheering for you,
Fred Lybrand
P.S.  If you found this useful, you also might like The 2 Things Needed to Parent Well

Successful Bedtime Routines in 5 Steps

I was reminded recently how important bedtime routines are for smaller children.  Perhaps you haven’t noticed, but it is the sworn duty of children to —

Eat too much sugar

Resist directions

Stay up as late as possible

This combination can easily make it a nightmare to get everyone to bed 🙂 at a decent moment.

I just read this article on bedtime routines…which I like.  The ideas are sound, however I’m not sure why waiting until a baby is three months old to begin is a necessary precaution.

Bedtime Routines: The Key to Sound Baby Sleep

One of the easiest ways to help your little one sleep well is by establishing a relaxing bedtime routine. Babies and toddlers naturally enjoy routines – and establishing a consistent bedtime routine from about 3 months of age

Jody and I experienced a lot of sanity by helping our 5 children settle into a bedtime sleep routine (including sleeping through the night) by the time they were 6 weeks old.  Imagine how much sanity (and peace) might be in your hope if you could simple say “Bedtime” and the house turned quiet!

Here’s our suggestions:

1.  Decide who will run your home.  If the children are in charge of the decisions then you are doomed.  You also are at the wrong site.

2.  Pick an actual I-want-you-in-your-bed-for-the-rest-of-the-night time for each child.  We spaced it out a bit…older children could stay up a little later.

3.  Write up and post (on the fridge  or somewhere) the actual sequence of steps to get into bed…bath, teeth, dress, straighten…  Also, explain the plan to all the children in a group meeting.

4.  Especially explain to the children that they do not have to sleep all night, they just must stay in (on it / always touching it like home plate) their bed the whole night.  This really is accurate as bedtime (instead of sleep-time).

5.  Put it on the calendar to review your betime plan in one month.  In the meantime, just work toward it without worry.  Worry if it isn’t working in a month.

Well, that’s a good bedtime routine start.  I dare you to try it for a month.


Fred Lybrand

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