​One of the worse things we do as parents is ‘favor’ a child over others. Sometimes it’s hard not to because we just ‘connect’ better some of our kids…but it doesn’t change the the reality of the mistake. Family Systems backs this common sense notion about the danger…and the solution.

Off to learn,

Fred Ray Lybrand

I’d love to hear your comments or answer your questions


Dr. Lybrand and his wife (Jody) of 40 years homeschooled their 5 children from birth to college, where they all excelled in academics and community (University of Texas & Abilene Christian). Dr. & Mrs. Lybrand have combined degrees of 2 BA's, 2 Masters, and 1 Doctorate), Fred and Jody have stuck with their faith and their obsession with practical learning. As a result, the overall theme of "Teaching Them to Learn How to Learn" invades everything they offer. Dr. Lybrand pastored for 25 years and currently coaches, consults, and trains leaders in businesses, churches, and non-profits. Among his client list are the U.S. Air Force, CRU, Be Broken, Continental Resources, State Farm Insurance, and Pioneer Natural Resources. Of course, one of his favorite interests is helping homeschoolers excel, and he does so with the 10 Courses of The Independent Homeschooer Curriculum & directly mentoring parents who belong to the tribe. Dr. Fred Ray Lybrand Jr. www.fredraylybrand.com

    2 replies to "The Parental Curse of a Favorite Child"

    • Paul

      Briliant video,Fred.Saw this post yesterday on Reddit. Favorizing kids is a very dangerous thing. My question is how turn things if we already did that. We love them both equally its just that they think we don’t. Is there a way to make them all feel important..

      • Fred Ray Lybrand

        The absolute easiest thing to do is to hug them in groups (not just alone and one-at-a-time).

        Besides that, model that the marriage is the higher priority to the two of you…the system will get the message 🙂

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